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What's the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get! I'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus. Baby, I'm like a firefighter, I find 'em hot and leave 'em wet! I would tell you a joke about my penis, but it’s too long! Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

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Hi, I’m wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn't have to be. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' between 'F' and 'CK’ F**k me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Laura? Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.

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